I am for Civil Union

Posted by Claris Quezon | Posted on November 16, 2019
not everything is black & white, rainbow existed for a reason

I have always advocated for civil union of the same sex because it is the right of every individual to enter into a contract. Controversy aside, let us focus on the human relationship, and not on their unacceptable social norms as others perceived it to be.

Sexual orientation and gender identity has nothing to do with criminal minds or actions. Let us separate criminal acts of individuals or sexual context (pornographic actions) from a humane relationship of those identifying themselves as another gender.

Recently, I lost a relative to the very silent killer, heart attack, it was sudden yes, but she had breast cancer also, so it was just another way out of pain and  she is lesbian. She was close to me, and I treat her as my second mom. Growing up I knew something was not as forgiving because there is always that friend of hers that is not invited to family gathering or worse will be mistaken as house hold chores’ assistant. When I was of understanding age, I understood who she was. A hush partner that must not be spoken of. It is  taboo to a very devout protestant family (paternal side). I drew ire of everyone because I would always include the “friend” to my regular summer visits.

I was eleven, when I was taken to the conference room to be lectured that woman and man is for each other. I was confused. But hey, I would always have my doc martens, played billiards, basketball and at times boxing matches to boys that would bully me or called me names. The part I really do enjoy, kicking people’s behind for being an ass. I was fifteen when I was asked to stopped being a “tomboy”. I find there is nothing wrong if I act and dress myself in boy clothes, I feel comfortable wearing them. Mama would always come to the rescue (I am a missed breed of Spanish & Chinese, so if they are arguing about me they use that, apparently so I cannot understand) and my mother will have the brunt of the disgust of my grandparents for allowing me to run wild. In Visayan, I would always hear, “kay bugay man gyud siya”….

I knew I hit the tipping point for everyone because I recognized that being lesbian is not wrong. She was not a criminal. She was not an abuser, nor a pedophile and all those disgusting criminal minded individual. For me, she was just Mama.

When she died, her partner was left speechless and unheard of. She does not have any right that should have been recognized. But is if they were man and woman then that kind of partnership can be considered common law wife and husband. Whoever die first gets to leave the other party the chance to decide the what & where of his/her final resting place, and she/he is entitled to those properties that were  left behind.
That is the disgusting truth of not recognizing the rights of those partners who is not able to enter into a legal cohabiting contract.

There are laws that can somehow protect the partners, such as contracts specifically drawn between them but it does not offer the same amount of protection as that of recognized cohabiting partners. Realities and reasons are hurting and destructive at the very least.

First, if they so decide to have their own child they will either be adopting from relatives or from someone who offers them a child. The law shall not recognize the other person as the parent after all only an identified male and female can be parents in the eyes of the law.

Second, the provisions of the family code only recognizes a husband and wife to inherit properties from each other. The law on inheritance insist that the first to be considered is the wife/husband, then the children, the parents, siblings and the extended families according to the hierarchy of filial ascendancy. But what if two female who has been living together build an empire? Sad,  but the truth is she can only keep her share but the share of the demised partner is given to her immediate family, fighting for it will just exhaust your resources, because greed also abounds in these relationship set up.

Third, when one dies, the other party will not be given a chance to speak nor be empowered to decide where and how the wake and internment will be done. I think amongst the three reasons, this is the scariest and heart wrenching. Can you imagine living with a person for years, sleeping and waking up beside that person then at her demise you cannot even express what the wishes of the dead was, because you are not to be heard and seen at all.

The Philippine judicial system is in its infancy, the only way that the humane treatment and recognition of both gender as cohabiting partners be accepted is through acknowledgment that human relationship is not about the genders, but two people having an informed decision to live together as one with shared vision on responsibilities and obligations toward one another.

RESPECT is treating everyone equally as HUMANELY as one needs to.

Please  support even if you  are not LGBTQ.

Other good reads...

A Birthday Wish for ALL from John Isaac Saguit : Can we just Get Along?

February 19, 2016 I don’t want to start my birthday with loads of negative emotions, so I’m just gonna let these all out. You already probably heard about it. Yes, about Manny Pacquiao’s statement, his usage of words from the Bible to back it up, and the outrage of the LGBTQIA+ community against it. Now, […]

HAPI-Kids’ Ecobricks project

Our HAPI kids’ project today is building eco bricks to save our environment. It is just another event to make use of our  time and talent in Alabang, Muntinlupa, Philippines. Last March 30, 2019, 7:00 am in the morning at 7C Ilaya Compound( near the Philippine National Railways Alabang Station behind Ayala Malls) in Muntinlupa. […]

Guest Blogger: The Filipino Culture of Pandering to Ignorance.

January 19, 2016 As the great philosophers, scientists and artists of our time have said quite often, why must we pander to the willful ignorance of the masses? Is being offended more important now than the propagation of intellectual dialogue and argumentation? What kind of future generations are we raising by teaching them to shut […]

Cafe Humaniste in Ormoc: Preventing Human Trafficking and Child Labor

Another success for the humanist community in the Philippines Humanists International, in collaboration with Humanist Alliance Philippines, International conducted its 2nd instalment of Cafe Humaniste in Ormoc City, Leyte, Philippines. Cafe Humaniste aims to promote values of humanism and rational thinking by way of informal discussions – and this time, literally over coffee. Organized by […]

We Condemn Gender Discrimination

The Humanist Alliance Philippines, International condemns the horrendous act of discrimination against transgender woman, Gretchen Diez, by a janitress and the other staff members of Farmers’ Plaza Mall in Cubao. Yesterday, transgender woman Gretchen Diez was humiliated in a mall restroom. Not only that Gretchen was blocked from using the women’s restroom, she was dragged […]

HAPI – Bacolod chapter volunteers to improve Mandalagan National High School murals

Submitted by Ayrton Macainan June 4, 2016 – HAPI – Bacolod chapter composed of Mandalagan National High School students volunteered to give the school a touch-up in preparation for the incoming school year of 2016 – 2017.   Driven by the common goal of serving humanity through the propagation of the message “Love one another”, […]

HAPI participates in protest against Hereditary Religion

On January 21, 2018, atheists, secularists and humanists from all over the world protested against early and involuntary indoctrination of religions. International Day of Protest Against Hereditary Religion is observed yearly through an online forum by non-religious individuals and representatives of secular organizations. This year’s was hosted in a Google Hangouts session by Damien Marie […]

Posted in

About The Author

Klaris, ang mandirigma ng hindi nauunawaan

HAPI Executive Secretary

Human rights activist

An advocate of Progressive Humanism

Aeta Literacy Leader

Scroll to Top